Palin Makes Bush Look Like a Rhodes Scholar

We never thought it would come to this.  Could someone possibly set the bar lower than George W. Bush?  After watching the Katie Couric interviews, Sarah Palin has comparatively made our President look like Albert Einstein.  Yes, she has only granted 3 major interviews since her selection one month ago, and she will probably surpass expectations in tonight’s debate [by stringing one or more sentences together].

However, no matter how astutely she avoids answering the questions in the debate, the question will remain – just how ill-informed can our President be?  Let’s set aside the qualifications of the Democrats as well as McCain.  Just looking at Sarah Palin, can anyone imagine this woman solving the great crises confronting us?  So what if she doesn’t know anything about foreign policy, the economy, landmark Supreme Court cases, the Bush doctrine, or even what newspapers she reads [wait, really??].  Maybe it isn’t fair to judge the chaos of her campaign or the incoherence of her overall message on a day-to-day basis.

So let us fairly judge how she has governed.  While Palin served as Governor, she put George W. Bush to shame with a whole new level of absenteeism as well as cronyism.  Throughout her administration all dissenters were purged in favor of loyalists and incompetent people from her hometown.  During her short 20 months in office, she spent 85 workdays in the state capitol, out of about 400 workdays.  The rest was spent at home, but don’t worry, she charged the taxpayers for every minute.  For those of you keeping score with your calculators, that’s 21 percent of her time in office that she showed up to work.  Even President Bush spent less time clearing brush on his ranch in Crawford!  As of March 2008, our current commander-in-chief has spent 879 days on vacation – already a record number for any modern president.  To quote our great leader, let’s do some “fuzzy math”:

There are 260 workdays in a year.  Seven (years in office) times 260 equals 1820 workdays.

Let’s take away 879 of those days [plenty of time for some good brush-clearin’]. That equals 941 days that he showed up to work.

Now, 941 divided by 1820 equals 52% time spent working.   Our President just barely worked more than half of his term, heckuva job Mr. President!

Apparently even our current vacation President has a better work ethic than Sarah Palin.  Don’t fret though, her absence would probably be for the best.  An unmanned aircraft is still better than a kamikaze.  Besides she’ll make great appointments for her cabinet.  When she invades Russia (see “Georgia gaffe“) I suspect she’s going to outsource the command decisions to her Defense Secretary, a position that will likely be filled by her old high school basketball coach [who got his experience frequenting the International House of Pancakes].

And isn’t it adorable?  She’s already practicing how to ignore subpoenas and block investigations into her role in the firing of the Alaska public safety commissioner to settle a personal score.   Some are comparing her personality and secrecy with Dick Cheney.  Please, this is an insult to Cheney.  The current Vice President may be a diabolical robot in disguise, but he’s no dummy.  When he exposed an undercover CIA officer to settle a personal score, he was smart enough to leave no fingerprints and have his flunky get the rap.  On the other hand, Palin thought there wouldn’t be a trail if she had her office calling the safety commissioner’s office more than 20 times to pressure him to fire a state trooper.

Mr. President, I thought you’d go down in history as our worst President ever.  You thought drowning an entire city, collapsing our economy, invading the wrong country, and failing to prevent the worst terrorist attack on US soil would cement your status.  Well it turns out you’re an amateur.  The good news is Sarah Palin will be breaking a glass ceiling – and the bad news is the whole glass building is going to cave in on us afterwards.



October 2, 2008. Election 2008.

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